Dear God

Dear God,

Why do you feel so far away from me?

I call out to you, and you answer me,

But I do not hear you.

I want to hear you

But my cowardice won't allow it.

And yet, you speak to me, still.

Why do you feel so far away from me?

It seems like you take one step forward,

Only for me to push you two steps backward.

I want to be near you,

But my heart won't allow it.

And yet, you walk towards me, still.

Why do you feel so far away from me?

One minute you are here, in my arms,

And the next you are gone, fallen from me.

I want to have you near me,

But my guilt won't allow it.

And yet, I find you reaching for me, still. 

Why do you feel so far away from me?

You are meant to be inside of me,

But I won't let you in.

I want you to hear me,

But my fear won't allow it. 

And yet, you are inside of me, still.